So there I was, 6:47 a.m., nursing a half-burned cup of diner coffee in a chipped mug that looked like it’d seen more action than my 401(k). I was sitting across from a buddy of mine—let’s call him Rick—who makes more in a bad month trading commodities than I made the entire year my band opened for ZZ Top’s roadies.
And he goes, dead serious, “You still ain’t in gold?”
I blinked at him, then at my coffee, wondering if I’d fallen behind on some secret financial cult. Turns out, maybe I had.
When the Dollar’s a Sinking Ship, Gold’s the Life Raft
Let’s rewind for a second.
I’m not your typical Wall Street guy. I’ve made my bones in dive bars, not boardrooms. I’ve invested in tequila distilleries that never distilled, and startups that “pivoted” right into bankruptcy. So, naturally, when someone tells me to trust a shiny rock dug outta the ground by some guy in a hardhat three continents away… I’m skeptical.
But here’s the kicker: gold doesn’t care if the Fed raises interest rates. It doesn’t tweet dumb stuff at 3 a.m. It doesn’t file for Chapter 11. It just… is. A silent, golden protest against the madness of man-made money.
Rick told me this:
“Gold’s like that one ex who never texts you back, but somehow she’s still got your respect.”
And you know what? That stuck.
My First Gold Buy: Not Exactly a Hollywood Moment
So, a week after our greasy spoon powwow, I did it.
I bought gold.
Well… not like a pirate chest full. Just a couple of coins from a reputable dealer whose website didn’t look like it was made in the 90s. I remember holding that first gold coin in my hand. It was a Canadian Maple Leaf, about the size of a silver dollar but felt like it weighed 10 pounds psychologically.
It was dense. Quiet. Serious. Like it had witnessed every financial meltdown since Rome fell and just shrugged.
I put it in a sock drawer. Then took it out five minutes later. Then hid it in the garage. Then panicked and moved it again. Paranoia and pride, wrapped in 24-karat shine.
Why Gold Made Me Sleep Better at Night (and I Sleep Like a Drummer After a Tour)
You see, gold doesn’t just diversify your portfolio—it diversifies your sanity. In a world where politicians print money like it’s going outta style (spoiler alert: it is), owning something real gives you a weird sense of peace.
It’s like, no matter what happens—market crashes, crypto hacks, bank bail-ins—you’ve got something that’s been valuable since Pharaohs wore eyeliner and walked like that.
Gold doesn’t rust. It doesn’t decay. It doesn’t “default.” Heck, it doesn’t even have earnings reports to disappoint you.
I call it “financial whiskey.” It warms your gut during economic winters.
But It Ain’t All Golden
Now, I won’t sit here in my worn leather jacket and pretend gold’s perfect. It’s not.
Gold doesn’t pay dividends. It just… sits there. Like a really attractive security guard with zero people skills.
Also, it’s kind of a pain to store. You either keep it at home and get paranoid every time Amazon drops a package off, or you pay someone to hold it in a vault that’s hopefully not in a country about to stage a coup.
Plus, the price swings can mess with your head if you watch it daily. Don’t do that. Seriously. That way lies madness and too much whiskey.
So… Is It a Good Idea?
Let me put it this way:
Gold won’t make you rich. But it’ll keep you from being poor in the worst-case scenario. It’s the kind of thing you stash away not for “growth” but for “just in case.”
Just in case the dollar tanks.
Just in case Wall Street lights itself on fire again.
Just in case you want to hand your grandkid something real, not just an IOU in an app.
Is it sexy? No.
Is it smart? Absolutely.
Would I rather have a few coins of gold than another round of Tesla stock that might nosedive when Elon tweets about buying a planet? Yes. Yes, I would.
Final Thought from a Guy Who’s Lost and Gained It All
I’ve invested in things that sounded cooler. I’ve made money on crazier bets. But gold?
Gold feels like home base in a game that keeps changing the rules. It’s quiet, it’s steady, and when the world gets noisy, that’s exactly what I want in my corner.
So, if you’re asking me—as someone who’s ridden bulls (both literal and financial), played guitar in 12 states, and once sold a failing brewery to a guy who thought it was a bakery:
Yeah, investing in gold’s a damn good idea.
Just don’t bury it in your backyard unless you plan on drawing a map. 🏴☠️
P.S. If you do get into gold, start small. Hold it in your hand. Feel it. Then tell me it doesn’t change how you see money.
It changed me.
And I don’t change easy.